I am so thankful that every year, I feel that I get a little wiser. This year has been the best so far. I have done some soul searching this year and I wanted share some of my techniques and ways of thinking that have made me very happy most of the time. Of course, I have my bad days. I had one yesterday. We are human so we are allowed to have days like that. Some days I am super grouchy and some days I am so happy that I can be a little annoying to others. :) Any who, here are some ways I live by to make sure that I live my life to the fullest.
1. Do what you want to do in life to make you and your family happy.
This is for everything. We recently made a pretty big decision for our family (more on that in the next post). Some people understood why we made that decision and others thought that we were crazy. I really don't care. It was our decision and we stand by it. Do not let others influence you to change your mind if you know that it is the right thing to do for you and your family. If you want to start a new business adventure, then do it! Don't let your friends make you feel that it is a stupid idea. If you want to accomplish something grand, then work hard at it and show them that they were wrong.
2. Stop making everyone else happy and focus on yourself.
I know that we were all told as kids to not be selfish and that is true but if you don't put yourself first sometimes, you may crash and burn from exhaustion. I am not talking about going shopping for yourself. I am talking about stepping away from your screaming kids for a few moments to get yourself calmed down and collect your thoughts. Of course make sure your kids are supervised before you hide in the closet but do what you got to do so that you don't blow up.
3. Stop when you get angry or upset and take a deep breath.
When my students are wild and are not listening to me, I want to flip out but instead, I tell my students how I feel and we stop what we are doing and do some breathing techniques. We meditate together. It only takes three minutes but it works. I calm down instantly and so do the kids. I love telling them how I feel and I plan to fix it so that maybe they will do it as they grow up and make better decisions. Give it a try
4. Declutter your life.
Not only does decluttering your house make your self happy, but decluttering your office space, email, calendar and you will be so happy your could scream.
5. Stop living by society's expectations and live life by your own expectations.
I am so sick and tired of hearing you are supposed to buy a house at 25 or have three kids by 30. Make up your own rules and live by them. Yeah I know I did everything out of order in my life. I had a kid at 16 ( I wouldn't advise that:), started college at 21 instead of 18, bought a house at 24, and started my career at 28. It's not what society says to do but it worked for me and we are doing pretty well.
6.Stop kicking yourself if you don't reach your goal.
I am very known to do this. If you have a goal to only eat fresh fruit and veggies for 30 days and you sneak a slice of pizza in on day 20, maybe make your goal more realistic like a 15 day goal. It's all about baby steps. Also make exceptions. Years ago I made a goal to never drink soda. I reached my goal but like twice a year, we get Root beer floats for desserts. I don't kick myself in the butt over it. It's mainly ice cream anyways. :)
7.For the love of Pete, stop playing the victim.
Back when I was 16 and pregnant (I was not on the show:), I could have played the blame game. I could have said "Well, if my parents would have got me on birth control then I wouldn't have gotten pregnant." What a load of crock! I made my bed and I decided to lay in it. I took my responsibility and owned it. I got a job to help take care of my daughter and worked my butt off at school. Everyone just needs to stop making excuses and get to business. Stop whining and get your life together. We need to stop making excuses. You are an adult and whatever happened in the past, learn from it and move forward.
8. Have a friend you can trust that you can talk to.
I don't mean someone that you know is a gossiper. Talk to a best friend that you know won't blab. My best friend which is also my husband is my therapist. We talk about everything and anything. I love that I can do that with him. He helps me on bad days when I need some guidance and good days when I just want to tell someone how my day went. It is so good to talk about whats important (and not important) things with a friend.
9. Start saying no!
This applies to everything! Work, friends and business endeavors.
You have to make sure your life isn't overflowed by other peoples tasks. I have to say no to some clients just because we are not the perfect match for one another and it's not fair to them or me. If you are a mom of three kids, then you know you get asked to do a whole lot of things like girl scout cookie stands, volunteering at the 5k, or baking cookies for the bake sale. It's okay to say no if you are too slam to began with. Don't go crazy for other people.
10. Don't live beyond your means.
We all want the newest car or the house that looks like Joanna Gaines designed it but don't do it if you can't afford it. And even if you can afford it, why not save your money for a vacation or put extra money in your retirement plan. We are looking into buying a car because my daughter will be getting mine. We were looking at brand new cars but then I had epiphany. Why are we in search of new car that is going to cost us well over $40,000. Why not look for a used one and save $20,000 in the bank. It's nice not to have to think like that anymore. Yes, I think we have earned a new car by far with how hard we work but who came up with those rules?? I would rather save our money for a vacation.
Bottom line, we are so lucky to be alive. Every morning, I have to remind myself that I am lucky to have woken up breathing in this air!